Who among us doesn’t like a pat on the back or a ‘you go, girl’ every now and then. I know that I do. At work, as much as I like to receive feedback on ways I can be more effective or promotable, I like to hear about what I do well even better. I like to see the “Wow!” look on people’s faces when I mention that I’ve run a few marathons (not that I force that little tidbit of info into a conversation, but you know, if it comes up naturally). And, I just love when people laugh at something super clever I’ve said or ‘like’ some witty Facebook status update that I’ve spent an hour thinking up.
Hey, at least I can admit it, right?
One thing that I have come to realize, though, is that I can’t rely too heavily on the accolades or even basic encouragement from those around me. If I do, I’ll lose motivation if and when those things don’t come. I recall that I used to feel disappointed when Hubby didn’t comment or ask enough questions about my writing. I used to interpret it as a sign that he wasn’t as supportive of my dreams and aspirations as he should be. I know – a little dramatic, but I bet you’ve been there too. The truth is he would read each and every post (at least that is what he says – I’ve never tested him :-)).
The truth is – at least as I see it – that when we base our motivation to do something on the reaction of friends, co-workers and even loved ones, we are really setting ourselves up for failure. Chances are the precise reaction that we are looking for will not come – not necessarily because our friends and family aren’t supportive…more likely they are just busy thinking about what they have going on in their own lives.